B.Day

Last wednesday was my birthday. I was sooo happpy on the previous days.on that day i went to work fulled of enthusiasm and happiness until i went back home and i faced my father and said b.d hurry up i just came and found your mom lied on the floor. i ran to her room and found her laid down on the floor without any movement. i was shocked and didnt know if she went unconscious or......
i checked her pulse and was week,after a while she talked to me crying. i've tried to find the cause but didnt know.no sign of hypoglycemia, her blood pressure and temperature were normal and didnt feel nauseated just suddenly felt down unconscious and there was no one beside her at that moment.
the cake was my sister's job and my father brought desert and at night all were celebrating including my mom but i kept sad and a faked smile on my face. i didnt like to show my sadness to her and tried to make her happy.
next day i was supposed to finish many staffs but i didnt and kept at home worried she might collapse.
she is fine now but im worry about her.
yesterday i went to Aljamiaa street and to Almansour then to Adamiyah,baghdad is great at night except for the lack of electricty that causes dark places and the presence of the concrete barriers around some destricts and at the checkpoints.last week many exlosions occurred.the photos of the candidates are spreading all over baghdad especially on walls of the high concrete barriers.
As for abu ghreib ,nthing changed the same unbelievable traffic jam on the entrance. by the way a driver showed me a way to enter Abu Ghreib without being searched!!!!!! its just about 2 kilometres away to enter through a village called "al thahab al abyath" where there is a checkpoint that allow the cars to enter and go ahead.
Today I was so angry at work,we still donthave electricity,half the instruments were not sterilized. a patient came asking for treatment.his tooth was indicated for extraction.of course without light and the dental chair position cant be changed.i was in need of the chair turbine to dissect the tooth but there wasnt neither the electricity nor the working dental chair.
One of the dentists began to blame me about receiving such case for treatment since we dont have facilities.we faced difficulties but it was extracted. he was right but i became so angry and told him that instead of blaming me ha had to blame the person(s) who was(were) responsible for this miserable situation.and I told the others that I'm ready to do anything just to supply this health institute with electricity and other necessary materials.imagine that the electrical connections are so bad that once they were about to fire.
i'm feeling guilty toward the poor patients.
this night i'm upset and dont like to talk about it. I need a break for a while and i have to do some revisions and decisions.

I Have a Dream

I'm listening to a song by westlife called "i have a dream",which is originally by Abba.anyhow,i kept repeating this song over and over thinking about the situation and the country i'm living in. i edited the song into:
"i have a dreeeeeam a worthy life to live innnnnn, i believe in miracles something good i hope to seeee " :)
my current status is:
i didnt go out of the house for the past two days except to the generator owner to see why the power was off and told me "im sorry we are repairing the generator". what a luck!.and went to buy credit to my mobile.
i didnt have have shower today,no electricity,cold weather. sometimes i say "thanks god, we've got water :)".i woke up on the sounds of weeping,i didnt know where it came from,may be from the people that passed along the street which is 100 metre away. they used to put loudspeakers in pick ups with the sounds of weepings "latmia".
an explosion occured in al-kathumyah by a suicidal woman on sunday. as i heard she was putting on her explosions and went to the crowdings who were entering the shrime of al-kathum.from that time the checkpoints were crowded and everywhere. women were not allowed to enter Al-Kathumyah.
On monday i went to work and the entrance to abu ghreib was filled with cars waiting to be searched including personal one.
we had to stop a side and step out of the car to be searched by the national guards.it was so accurate that many people left buses and walked behind the checkpoint! if anyone of those was carrying a weapon or explosives,he would be easily enter the city.
our destrict was closed on tuesday and didnt know why!!!!
again i'm thinking that i'm wasting my time. i kept surfing on the net and applied to a postgraduate course.
tomorrow i'll finish the medical examinations.
Could anyone tell me what is happening in Gaza? why is all this bombardment? on tv i just see and hear innocents have been killed.
may god protect innocents and may peace be the world's priority.

A New Year

Happy new year.
last week i didnt go neither to mosul nor to any place outside baghdad. first of all my dad refused the idea then i had to do some medical investigations,i took many days off, i'll talk about that in another post.
this year i didnt go out and celebrate as the last one.
today is the first day of 2009 but the celebrations was over as i went to almansour few hours ago. i remembered last year it continued.may be because its tooooooo cold :).
the biggest step in 2008 was the blog, i created it in september 2007 but started my first post on jan 2008 after the encouragement of mama and her daughter sunshine.i had many goals that i couldnt achieve last year that im hoping to accomplish this year.
Btw, you remember dr"O", i talked about him in a previous post. he is in new zealand now.
i hope peace will shake the iraqis' hands and step into the houses.